Sadie was almost 3 months old on Mother's Day and I took the opportunity to reflect on my first three months as a mother.
I suppose you can officially be considered a mother when your baby is conceived, and you fully take on that role when your baby is born, but I really feel like I didn't BECOME a mother until right around Mother's Day, when Sadie was almost three months old.
My first three months postpartum were truly a blur. Those first weeks home after Sadie's birth were filled with recuperating, recovering, resting, and reflecting after an intense and amazing birth experience.
Time flew by as I learned how to hold, feed, change, bathe, comfort, sing and talk to my daughter. Sadie's angelic demeanor definitely allowed me to enjoy her first few months more than I may have if she had been fussy or hadn't been sleeping so well.
Every moment that Sadie and I spent together was a learning experience for both of us. By trial and error, I got a handle on some logistics (breastfeeding, sleeping, and sucking all those Colorado boogers out of her nose). I had a lot of help and support from family, friends (especially those other mamas in my life), and mostly from my amazingly wonderful husband. Brian's support, love, insight, and comforting manner have truly allowed me to enjoy new motherhood to its fullest. Brian, thank you for making me a mother. It is absolutely the best thing that has ever happened to me!
But the person I have learned the most from in these past few months is my daughter.
Sadie Caroline, you have taught me about patience (this is a big one), about the value of sitting quietly and staring into your baby's eyes, and about the pure beauty of a baby's smile. I have learned to love and respect your father more than I ever thought possible. You have helped me to become a better listener. Because of you I have gained a new kind of confidence in myself and I have found myself being completely selfless for the first time in my life.
"I could not get my fill of looking. There should be a song for women to
sing at this moment or a prayer to recite. But perhaps there is none because
there are no words strong enough to name that moment. "